TA, Divorce Brainstorm

WATCO divorce on the quality of life of the children affected?



(A) divorce will (B) decrease a child's quality of life because(A1) being caught in a middle of a parental conflict and losing the consistant care of one parent will (C) potentially cause them emotional, social, and spiritual harm.



Implicit Assumption - (C) causing children emotional, social, and spiritual harm (B) may put them at a much higer risk for drug and alcohol abuse, sexual promiscuity, poor school performance, and various kinds of victimization.



Audience: I'm thinking of writing to middle class parents who may be separated and/or contemplating divorce.



Intro: When a marriage is dead and beyond hope of resuscitation, it is needful to have a means to end it. Two examples from the Philippines are illustrated here. Two days after their temple marriage, a husband deserted his young wife and has not been heard from for over 10 years. A married woman fled and obtained a divorce in another country, but her husband, who remained behind, is still married in the eyes of the Philippine law. Since there is no provision for divorce in that country, these innocent victims of desertion have no way to end their married status and go forward with their lives. (Oaks, 2007). The children of the 1970's were the first generation to view divorce as 'normal' and/or socially acceptable. Before the 1970's, divorce was stigmatized. It was seen as embarrassing and/or unnacceptable in the eyes of society. Nowadays, however, divorce seems to be as commonplace almost as filing your taxes. People speak now of 'starter' marriages, and being married and divorced two and three and four times doesn't seem to affect them at all. What are the reasons for this shift in societal values? What are the consequences to the parties involved, even the innocent parties, the children? What affects, negative or positive, does divorce have on those who are not at fault and have no control over and no say in the decisions of their parents?



PROS:

• not getting divorced allows children to grow up in a two parent home
• avoids a whole lot of running around, 'switching the kids off' between mother and father.
• choosing to work through marital problems may strengthen or ressurrect the marriage.
• avoids financial problems that come with splitting into two households.

CONS:

• gives the feeling that the parents are 'just doing it for the kids'. love has died and they're simply staying together for the children
• expose kids to unhealthy marital discord: fighting, nagging, etc....
• may give children false view of the sanctity of marriage.
• may aggrevate the marital discord more, especially in abusive situations.

Refernce:

Elder Dallin H. Oaks. Divorce. Ensign, May 2007. Retreived on 09 March 2008 from http://lds.org/conference/talk/display/0,5232,23-1-690-25,00.html

RA, Is Money the Culprit in Most Divorces?

In this article By Liz Pulliam Weston entitled, "Money isn't the culprit in most divorces" http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/CollegeAndFamily/SuddenlySingle/MoneyIsntTheCulpritInMostDivorces.aspx, the author tries to persuade the reader to reevaluate the real causes of divorce, and put away the conventional thinking that all marital problems can be traced back to money. After all, there are as many happy poor couples as there are unhappy rich couples.

Ms. Weston is definitely a credible source. She is a graduate of the certified financial planner training program at the University of California, Irvine. She has also authored many books and writes a financial column for MSN Money.

She directs her remarks toward the general public who haven't taken a deeper look into the causes of divorce, but instead buy into the common thinking that it's all money related.

***STAR***

Sufficient: She does a good job of including enough data and findings and examples and history to make it a thourough article. She starts way back at World War II and explains where the root of money problems and divorce came from. She does a good job of relating that to what we now beleive.

Typical: Her sources are good sources but they are not typical to most people.

Accurate: I find her sources to be very accurate. She quotes experts and doesn't twist or bend what they said, but instead builds on their comments to clarify.

Relevant: I think this article is relevant mostly. She stuck to the point and did a good job of quoting the experts and reviewing the findings of her sources.

Overall Effectiveness: I felt that this was a fairly effective argument, but I'm still not convinced. All throughout the article, the experts she quoted seemed to hint that money really was a big factor, but that it also was, in many cases, used as a cover all excuse for divorce. I think the issues they brought up are big ones, such as the 'jerk' factor and incompatibility. However, I think that money problems, such as debt, cause just as much friction in marriage if not more. Debt is thing that grinds away at the resolve of the two spouses on a daily basis, just as the other factors do. Overall, she had great points, but I think in the end she downplays the seriousness of money problems that lead to divorce.

FW, Family

Families are awesome. I'm starting to debate whether to do a my next paper on the consequences of family influence on a child's growth and development spiritually, mentally, physically, socially, and all other aspects.

The family is really a catch all organization. A family team has the ability to prepare each son or daughter for all of the different roles they will have in life. For example, family has prepared me for marriage. When I got home from a mission to Canada a year and a half ago, I was not anywhere near ready for marriage. Most people think that coming off a mission, a kid would be at his/her spiritual peak, but not in my case. When I came off my mission I was emotionally sapped. I was a wreck. It took several months of counseling with my mother and father to get me back two emotional health. I consider that counseling one of the leading factors in preparing me for marriage. I was able to learn how to communicate feelings that are difficult to put into words. I was able to talk about my deepest rooted feelings and thoughts and work through them with those I love most.

Development is made possible within the bonds of a loving family through trust. I trust my mom and dad implicitly. I beleive that they want only the best for me, their son, and that they have my best interest in mind when they give counsel. I don't find that same trust hardly anywhere else, except with my wife, who is also a member of my family.

My family has helped me develop socially. It was a great thing for me to be able to bring dates over to my mom's house to have them meet my parents and borther's and sisters. It's been a positive experience every time one of my brothers have brought a date to my mom's house where we get to meet her and ask her questions in a safe environment. Mom's house is also where all of our family gatherings happen. Big Sunday dinners allow all of the siblings to congregate and socialize together. There we talk about our relationships, our educational pursuits, our jobs or careers. We debate political views and theological views and views on social matters. We discuss sports, reminice about memories, swap mission stories, and play games. All of these wholesome activities lend themselves to the development of each individual in every aspect of life.

FW, Ready for spring

I am ready for spring. I took my break today at work and walked around the canyon park technology center grounds. I walked past the basketball courts, which were still covered with snow. I thought about last summer and all the good times I had playing basketball on those courts. Sometimes I would play pick-up games with whoever else was on the courts. Sometimes I would go with buddies and have three point shoot-outs or lay up contests. Most of the time though, I would just play by my self. I'd strap on my adidas, tie the drawstring tight on my shorts and dawn my favorite Lebron James jersey. And then all my worries would go out the window and I could just concentrate on getting that cow hide globe to hit home. It was nice and warm today and the sun was shining brightly, and I longed for those courts to be clear so that I could play basketball.

Those basketball courts hold a lot of bitter-sweet memories for me. There was the time when I hit six three-pointers in a row and thought I was king of the world. And then there was that seventh shot that just barely rimmed out and broke my heart. Then, there was the time I rolled my ankle while playing against nobody but myself, and there was the time I lost my ball in the high, overgrown weeds by the cafeteria building. There were those days I played in the pouring rain and other days in the scourching sun, as my face dripped with sweat. There were days when I played until dark and I still hadn't had enough. Those were the days. Good times. Good times.

Then, I passed the courts and finished my break, and sat back down in my cubicle. I logged into my phone and started taking calls again. Boy I can't wait for spring!

RA, Affirmative Action in Education

I read an article off the internet called Action Alert: Affirmative Action and Education. I'll be analyzing it for my rhetorical analysis this week. The article comes from this website: http://gbgm-umc.org/umw/action_affirmative_action.html, and was generated by the Untied Methodists Women's Action Network.

The article was a exposition on Affirmative action as it relates to education. The main point of the article was to inform the reader about both the historical issues that have arisen around this topic and modern day trends.

The target audience of the article seemed to be simply the interested, reasonably educated reader. The fact that it was generated by a religious group doesn't seem to have anything to do with the target audience. The language used was professional and objective, but clear and easily understood. Logos was the strong suit of the article, as they cited numerous U.S. Supreme court cases, along with various historical facts and examples. The organization writing the article seems to be a fairly credible source. They cited some other reliable sources which increases their credibility, and I didn't see any information that looked skewed or innacurate. The ethos of the article was very limited. It didn't sound like they were trying to appeal to any emotion other than simple reason and logic.

The source did include enough evidence to support it's purpose. Numerous court cases were cited to drive home the idea that affirmative action is being challenged across the country, although they did seem to dwell primarily on one or two of those cases. The cases they cited were consistent with what experts say on this subject. As far as relevance goes, the source stayed focused on it's objectives and communicated it's point effectively. This was an effective argument.

TA, Alternative Assessment

Yesterday in class we talked about alternative assessment and it really struck my interest. I enjoyed going over all the benefits and concerns associated with moving away from standardized testing and going toward testing with essay questions, short answer, portfolios, etc....

At first alternative assessment seems like a really good idea to me. It allows for creativity and thinking. It allows for personal effort on the student's part along with a more personalized grading system. This type of testing would be great for smaller scale assessment such as a particular class or school.

I was turned off to the idea though when we started examining some of the disadvantages. We talked about how the grading process is so much more subjective with Alternative Assessment. It would be so easy for a teacher to grade some students harder than others based on the student's behavior in class, the teacher's attitude toward the student, and any personal predjudices or predispositions a teacher has toward his/her students. For example, a teacher could develop a predjudice against a disruptive student that could influence how hard that teacher graded said student on the assessments.

An answer to this problem would be to have a third party actually grade the tests. This would allow for an objective approach to grading. While increasing cost and perhaps complicating the process to a small degree, a third party grading system would ensure that each assessment be graded in a totally objective manner, only taking into account the work of the student.

This could be a great topic for my paper on Education. Maybe I could look up studies on the advantages and disadvantages of alternative assessment in certain areas. I could argue that alternative assessment can be too subjective if not checked by objectivity.

Revision

Yesterday in class we talked about alternative assessment and it really struck my interest. I enjoyed discussing the benefits and concerns associated with moving away from standardized testing to testing with essay questions, short answer, portfolios, etc....

At first alternative assessment seems like a positive change. It allows for creative thinking. It demands personal effort on the student's part along with a personalized grading. This type of testing would benefit smaller scale assessment such as a particular class or school.

I was turned off to the idea though when we started examining some of the disadvantages. We talked about how the grading process is dangerously subjective with Alternative Assessment. It would be so easy for a teacher to grade some students harder than others based on the student's behavior in class, the teacher's attitude toward the student, and any personal predjudices or predispositions a teacher has toward his/her students. For example, a teacher could develop a predjudice against a disruptive student that could influence how hard that teacher graded said student on the assessments.

An answer to this problem would be to have a third party actually grade the tests. This would allow for an objective approach to grading. While increasing cost and perhaps complicating the process to a small degree, a third party grading system would ensure that each assessment be graded in a totally objective manner, only taking into account the work of the student.

This could be a great topic for my paper on Education. Maybe I could look up studies on the advantages and disadvantages of alternative assessment in certain areas. I could argue that alternative assessment can be too subjective if not checked by objectivity.

FW, BYU Married Ward

Today my brand new wife and I went to our new ward for the first time. It's the BYU fifth ward, for young married couples. It was an experience that I won't forget because it was such a strange experience. This was much a much different experience than I've had in the single's ward I've been attending for the past year and a half. We walked into the chapel and sat down and looked around and realized that every man was attached to woman and every woman was attached to a man. You see, I had gotten used to the ward being the place to check out all the new ward girls, go to ward 'stare' and get a few phone numbers, and basically just do my own thing. It was weird to think that every person in that building today was taken, including me. I kept looking at everyone's left ring fingers and seeing that every one of them had a ring on it.

Much different from the family wards I'm used to attending, it seemed like I saw dozens of new born babies, all under one year old, being held and fed and rocked and shushed by mothers and fathers, that is, mothers and fathers not all that much older than us. Again, I'm more used BEING the fussy child in the third row, not FEEDING that fussy child.

I felt intimidated at first when I realized that we were probably the couple who have been married the least amount of time out of everyone in that chapel. Every one else was probably ahead of me in school and much more experienced in married life. The teacher in our Sunday school class talked about how we can strengthen our marriage and it was weird to think that it really applied to me.

So what, you think all that scares me? I'm not scared. I'm just nervous, that's all. Marriage is a big thing and I want to start of right and do everything right and develop good habits and all that jazz. It's a stressful time. I don't know where I'm going with this. Luckily, this is my free write so I don't really have to go anywhere with it.